In “How to Be a Friend (In an Unfriendly World),” Barnet Bain reminds us that connection is a soft skill that can be developed by all. Drawing from his Columbia University master’s course and decades of storytelling, Bain offers practical ways to stay open-hearted even when the world feels impatient and divided. “Friending,” he writes, “is how we practice love in public.” This book invites readers to slow down, listen deeply, and remember that friendship begins where judgment ends.

From his new book “How to be a Friend (in an Unfriendly World) and Columbia University course, Bain provides nine tools to foster friendships and the experience of connection.

The first book on friendship was written in 44 BC by Cicero. Bain revives connection and community as he blends philosophy, psychology, and film storytelling to teach us all how to view and develop our experience of connection through being a good friend.

From “What Dreams May Come” to “Milton’s Secret,” Barnet Bain’s films have explored love, loss, and redemption. His new book takes those lessons off-screen, teaching readers how to craft real-life stories of friendship, forgiveness, and listening. He says, “Every story is a love story,” proving that we all yearn to experience connection.

Many of us are asking, “What happened to civility?” Bain believes friendship is the antidote. “How to Be a Friend (In an Unfriendly World)” offers soft-skill tools like “Provide Safety” and “The 24-Hour Intent Test,” helping readers rekindle connection and reset friendship when they go off course. Whether it’s texting “Thinking of you, no reply needed” or saying “Hey, I miss us. Can we talk?” Bain shows how simple gestures can repair disconnection and restore belonging.

Known for films that explore the human spirit (from "What Dreams May Come" to "Homeless to Harvard") Bain now turns his lens on everyday relationships. In his new book, he blends narrative craft with psychological insight, translating timeless cinematic truths into everyday practices of empathy, listening, and forgiveness.